we carry your heart

e. e. cummings wrote...

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once upon a time, Andy and I fell in love over the poetry of e e cummings. This one was always special to me. It seems to have a whole new meaning now. We all carry Jake's heart. So many of us have loved (and still love) him.

As so many of you know, Jake's heart lives on. For many months, Andy and I, and our parents, have followed the lives of Jake's heart recipient through his family's blog. In the beginning of October they contacted us anonymously through the donor organization. This is the way the organizations ask you to do it. Well, soon after, as we have indicated in previous posts, little Beckham went through a tumultuous time. We debated over what we should do. We had wanted for so long to contact his family, but we couldn't find the right words. Now we needed to tell them so much at such a difficult time. Ultimitely we decided to give full disclosure and tell them everything. So about three weeks ago we sent them a letter, including several ways to contact us.

Last night we received an email. I cannot possibly put to words how it made us feel to make a real connection with this family which has meant to much to us for so long. We love Beckham as we love Jake, for he has our little star within him.

So, this poem strikes such a chord. We all carry Jake's heart, a part of our lives that has been forever changed by his little life. And Beckham truly carries Jake heart, and Kim, Nate, Gwen and all their family and friends, too, carry Jake's heart. Jake may have left us physically, but he will never truly die, because he lives on in so many wonderful people. We cannot express our gratitude to all those who have followed our journey, and Beckham's, through the last fifteen months. Our hearts are full.

If you would like to share anything with the Scadlock family, their blog is scadlock.blogspot.com.